Smart Car
by Doug Hawley
17: Ghost Writer From The
Sky
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Sheila told Duke, “Hurry
up we want to get there before dark”.
As usual, Duke did not hurry “I’ll be
ready in a few. I’ve just got to
check on the Trailblazers latest draft bust.”
Fifteen minutes later they started the short walk
to the Buck tree, a huge cedar named after an
early benefactor of Iron Mountain Park in the
middle of Lake Oswego. They had opened
their Christmas cards earlier. There
were no presents because they got whatever they
wanted whenever they wanted and had no need for
more clutter.
Their ritual of many years was to go to the Buck
Tree on Christmas Day, have a bottle of Pinot
Grigio, a few snacks and tell each other what
they had to be thankful for.
Sheila started. “I’m so
happy that the USA has not been in any wars for
fifty years, and that the military has largely
been used for domestic purposes.” Sheila
was particularly anti-war because she was the
descendant of a president who was guilty of war
crimes, but not punished.
“I like that bad drugs have largely been
replaced by fun, mostly organic hallucinogens.”
Sheila again “Renewable energy, wave,
geothermal and hydro have mostly replaced fossil
fuels.” She blushed a little
because her antique Dodge Charger named Deuce
still ran on contraband petrol and at that very
moment was having fun in stealth mode on Iron
Mountain Boulevard. In part to cover
her embarrassment, she asked “What are Carl
and Josie up to?”
“They are having a romantic evening out in
the country where their loud antics can’t
disturb the general public. I’ve
never seen two cars that make more noise while
having sexual escapades. Speaking of
the limit on fossil fuel, we get snow in Lake
Oswego again now that global warming is
retreating.” A light snow had
started to fall.
Duke opened his mouth, but didn’t speak. A
little old man who vaguely resembled Saint Nick
said “Hi Duke, I’m your creator Doug. Here’s
my card.”
Duke pressed the biography circle on the card and
images of “Doug” entered his mind
showing a quick biography of Doug and a voice
over. Doug grew up in the middle of
the last century, studied math, married Sharon
who became his editor and wrote his most popular
stories, the smart car series.
After the biography had concluded, there was no
card and Doug had disappeared as mysteriously as
he had appeared.
He looked at Sheila and said “That is the
weirdest thing that has ever happened.”
“Oh yeah.”
“Can you believe that we are the creation of
some writer?”
“That’s what you saw? I saw
purple monkeys riding on pink elephants.”
They looked at each other for about five minutes
and chorused “The mushrooms, the special
mushrooms”.
We wish you peace and joy all around the
world. The title is a play on “Ghost
Riders In The Sky”, a favorite of the ghost
writer. This story was requested by
Sam Kandej for a Christmas collection. Thanks
Sam.
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