Estrogen Jammies
by R. Oren
Walker, Jr.
For more than a
week, my beloved wife had been particularly tense
and irritable. Exasperated by this uncomfortable
development, I finally queried her about the
possible sources for her unrest. Sheepishly, she
confessed that she had forgotten to renew the
prescription for her estrogen patch, but declared
that she would attend to this oversight in a
timely fashion.
Suspect, I
diligently pursued the matter the very next day
and was reassured to find that she had indeed
been to the pharmacy and received her refill.
However, her objectionable behavior persisted.
While I was both curious and perturbed, I was
resigned to believe that discretion must be the
better part of valor.
Suppressing my
concerns, I was resolved to hope that time would
eventually grant us some closure and restore the
missing elements of our happy marriage. Several
more days passed, but there was no discernible
change. Undaunted, I stood firm in my convictions
and said nothing.
Throughout this
ordeal, of course, my wife insisted that nothing
was wrong. Eventually, I forgot myself and
pressed the issue. Her scathing retort was that:
“If there was a problem, I was to blame”.
She went on to state that any semblance of
dissatisfaction was undoubtedly a consequence of
my selfish attitude and protracted neglect. It
seemed that I was defeated and destined to endure
whatever cruel abuse she saw fit to administer.
That night, as my
wife and I made preparations to retire for the
evening, I happened to glance in her direction.
She was wearing a swank pair of black fleece
pajamas. Leaning toward her, I strained to
clearly appreciate the logo that appeared,
perfectly centered, over the pocket on the rear
of her PJ’s. When I was sufficiently close
to adequately visualize the details of this two
inch circular monogram, I was surprised to find
that instead of a stylish label, it was her
latest estrogen patch, strategically placed, not
on her skin, but outside her jammies.
I could not
refrain from casually commenting that she should
ask her doctor for a higher dose of estrogen if
she expected the medicine to be absorbed through
the fabric of this nightwear.
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