Coffee-Cupping
As Fashion and Style Editor
of this magazine, I am receiving an increasing
number of questions from readers as to the most
sophisticated and trend-conscious way to
undertake the newly fashionable activity of
coffee-cupping.
Around one in four people
now habitually carry a take-away coffee container
in one hand whenever walking through city streets,
and so guidance as to the hottest and coolest
coffee-cupping techniques is perhaps long overdue.
It must be stressed that cc
etiquette is still evolving as more celebrities
are observed leaving Starbucks and Costa Coffee.
The following notes, however, may, for the moment,
ensure that readers can avoid the most
embarrassing of the potential faux pas.
The type of cup:
A large container
is absolutely essential.
Coloured cardboard cups are
much to be recommended, although white
polystyrene can be used in an emergency if a
darker coloured heat sleeve is utilised.
Visibility of brand logos
is currently a contentious point, and it is best
to hide advertising related to the source of your
beverage. Each major high street coffee house is
hated by a different sector of the population for
one reason or another. For example, Starbucks has
become associated with tax avoidance and Costa
Coffee is accused of causing the closure of every
local independent coffee shop. It is therefore
best for the fashion conscious coffee-cupper not
to be directly associated with any specific
retailer.
One huge advantage of such
anonymity, however, is that any large paper cup
and sleeve can be used – indeed many people
purchase these directly from their local pound
shops. This is hugely cheaper than obtaining the
accessory from a high street coffee outlet
because the latter also charges for the coffee
– asking for an empty cup or hunting through
coffee shop bins for a discarded container is
definitely uncool.
Buying empty cups, of
course, raises the question of what to put in
them:
The contents of the
cup:
Part of the reason for the
recent surge in the popularity of coffee-cupping
is that the content of the cup is completely
irrelevant from a fashion perspective.
Research has shown that
around one in five coffee-cuppers have nothing in
their containers at all. Not only is this by far
the cheapest way to keep up with the trend, but
it also eliminates the danger of spillage. Such
an approach can also be considered to be
extremely sensible: by any rational standard,
great numbers of people rushing through our busy
streets holding large containers of hot liquids
is neither a wise nor socially responsible thing
to do.
Many people top up their
cups with beer, whisky or some other favoured
form of alcohol. Because a plastic lid covers
each cup, the colour of the contents is never
seen. This means that liquids which are not
vaguely coffee coloured, such as gin or vodka,
can also be used.
If there are concerns that
a boss might notice the unusual colour of a
beverage or a police officer might detect
something untoward in an alcohol prohibited city
area, then most drinks can be made to resemble
coffee with the judicious addition of suitable
food colourings.
It is best to stick to
liquids, however. All experiments to sniff
cocaine from a coffee cup while rushing through a
city street have thus far proved unsuccessful.
Many people have found that
filling the cups themselves not only affords an
infinite choice of content but also avoids the
insanely long wait in a coffee shop while a
barista undertakes the arcane rites and rituals
necessary to produce an indifferent drink that
tastes not vastly different from a cup of decent
instant.
The carrying of the
cup:
This is probably the most
critical of the deportment techniques: too high
and you might not see where you are going –
or risk smashing your cup into the face of a
passer-by; too low and you risk tipping the
contents onto the ground, your feet, your hand or
a more sensitive part of your body – all of
which are horrific embarrassments that can be
very hard to live down.
It is best to keep the
elbow joint at a ninety degree angle while on the
move – with the cup at waist height. This
will also help to keep the container in a more or
less level mode.
Advanced coffee-cuppers
have begun to integrate their containers into
physical gesturing: a cup can be adequately held
with three fingers and a thumb – this frees
the index finger to point at something of
relevance, scratch a head or whatever. It is best,
however, to practice at home with a cup of cold
water prior to trying such complex manoeuvres
with hot coffee.
It is understood that
Samsung are working on the first integrated
coffee cup and smartphone.
For the most fashion
conscious, courses in coffee-cupping are planned
for the near future. In the interim, however, we
hope that the above guidance can help more people
to confidently emulate their cc icons.
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