The Séance
‘The lights have been
extinguished. We have linked hands to form an
unbroken circle around this table, and we are
ready to commence the séance… Is there
anybody there?’
‘Cor blimey, you
frightened the life out o’ me. I fort the
‘owse was empty!’
‘Ah, a soul is
communicating!’
‘I don’t want no
trubble, misses. The lites was off - I fort
everyone ‘ad gone owt. I’ll be on me
way.’
‘Remain, shy vision.
Have you come from the other side?’
‘I come from the uvver
side o’ the kitchin’ winda, if that’s
wot yer mean.’
‘I understand –
you are a roving spirit. What has brought you to
this house tonight?’
‘I was afta the video.’
‘How wonderful! I feel
quite faint with excitement. Never before has a
visitor from the other side sought material
possessions. You must take it to the hidden world
with our blessings.’
‘Er… thanks
misses, that’s really generus.’
‘I see you take the
form of a beam of light?’
‘That’s me
flashlight, misses… Ah, I can see the video…’
‘What a curious term
for an embodiment of a soul.’
‘Rite, I’ve got
it - I’ll be off now.’
‘Please stay and
enlighten us further. Do you have a name?’
‘I don't usually tell
that to ‘ouseolders.’
‘Your otherworldly
secrets are safe with us. We have sworn oaths!’
‘It’s Eric. Me
mates call me Fingers.’
‘May we call you the
same?’
‘If yer like.’
‘What else do you seek
here, Mr Fingers?’
‘Whateva’s abowt.
Cash is always 'andy – or jewlrey.’
‘Remarkable! There is
cash and jewellery in the drawers behind you
– please take it.’
‘Er…ta.’
‘Friends, I believe we
are witnessing the greatest moment in
spiritualist history!’
‘Fanks for awl this,
misses. I’d betta be goin’ now. Me
mate, George, is outside wiv the engin' runnin’.
He’ll be finkin’ I’ve bin nicked.’
‘Depart, Mr Fingers,
with our best wishes. Have you any final advice
for those on this side?’
‘I fink you shud keep
yer windas shut when the ‘owse looks empty.’
‘Many thank, Mr
Fingers, and farewell...
Let us take a moment for the link with the other
world to close... Now, I shall turn on the lights…
Yes, yes, it is just as I had dared to hope - the
video is gone, as are the other possessions - we
have joined with the other side in material and
fiscal communion!
Once again, our meeting has broken new ground in
communication with the forbidden world.
You will all remember the early morning
gathering, sunlight obscured by heavy curtains,
when milk was delivered from the world beyond!
You will also recall the afternoon meeting,
frequented by the presences of utility meter
readers!
We must next meet on a Sunday morning, when
normal people remain in bed, and attempt to
experience manifestations of Jehovah’s
Witnesses!
But for now, we must go. The residents of this
property will shortly return, and the police will
soon be summoned to investigate the thefts.
We must, sadly, return to our ethereal realm. We
can, however, take solace from another
wonderful, though fleeting, encounter with the
living.’
| 