Toast Of The
Town
by Rick Tornello
The captain of the star ship Je-Nna
reread the star chart screen. It indicated that
the planet they were orbiting had not been
visited in centuries. Add to that, the planet was
so distant that its existence was lost somewhere
deep in the historical archives. It had no name.
Only a single expeditionary flight had been made
but there was no report in the record other than
contact had been made. It was by the dint of a
data entry mistake in the navigation software
that the ship was orbiting here.
The weapons engineer scanned for RF
and sensor transmissions. Computer analysis
indicated a low level of technology but at least
they had radio. The Captain sent a message
broadcast over a number of frequencies indicating
their arrival, location and some other data. She
kept the shields on full just in case and waited
for a response.
She didn’t have to wait long.
The computer translated the message as “Welcome
to the Je-Nna captain and crew. We haven’t
seen outsiders for a very long time. We welcome
your arrival and look forward to celebrating with
you. Arrangements can be made securely. Please
respond, signed Planet EH Welcoming Committee.”
“Well, now we know its name,
Planet EH, ” laughed the captain. And to the
crew she stated, “It appears as if we’ll
be the toast of the town. I’d like to get 10
volunteers to transport on-planet with me.”
She always had an upbeat character. There was
always a demand for her ship when there was an
opening. The whole crew volunteered requiring a
lottery to be drawn up.
The co-captain and weapons engineer
decided not to pull rank and to remain on board
while monitoring the celebration below. She
transmitted their location and the procedures
being undertaken to the home federation. For some
reason there appeared to be a problem and the
transmission engineer was on-planet with the rest
of the visiting crew. “Shit” she said.
“Can anyone fix this?”
A junior engineer stepped forward
and offered his service. “Ma’am, I’m
not an expert but I have some experience in this
sort of thing.”
“Please have a go at it,”
she commanded.
Meanwhile on planet the landing
party was being given a parade through the
planets’ capital. A feast was planned for
later the next day. Screens throughout the planet
broadcast the arrival of the off-planet guests.
The pictures were transmitted to the starship Je-Nna
too. Businesses shut down for the declared
holiday.
The co-captain decided to research
the history of this planet. In the ship’s
library for hours, she stumbled upon a section
dealing with odd and possibly dangerous locations
and this planet with no name showed up. She
requested classified access. After reading the
data she felt she needed to contact the captain
immediately.
On the non-local sub quantum com she
raised the captain. “ Sir, you must leave
the planet immediately. You and the crew are in
possible danger.”
The captain laughed, “Yeah I
know. It’s a planet of cannibals. Well, it
was at one time and that’s why we never
heard back from that first exploratory ship. They
explained it and have been very apologetic. They
changed their ways centuries ago. It was based
upon a nutritional deficiency that they had no
medical technology to overcome and just lived
with it. A cure was discovered and now, like any
family, they have skeletons in their closet that
they usually don’t discuss. We’re on
our way to a dinner invitation with the premier
of the planet. In fact, I’m in his palace
presently. Check the coordinates. He says we’re
the “toast of the town”, to use one of
our expressions. It seems they have been
monitoring us for some time. I’ll get more
data on that technology as soon as I can. They
reverse engineered the technology from the ship
that landed here centuries ago and would guess a
few other unlucky crews too. It appears rather
advanced. Funny our sensors didn’t pick it
up.”
“Yeah, funny,” replied the
co-captain sarcastically. “I’d get off
there. It seems our COM systems are jammed,
compromised or some such nonsense. And how many
times have I been wrong? I don’t trust them.”
“You’re always such a buzz-kill.
Just stay linked. I believe this is beyond their
tech levels. Captain signing off.”
Now off line, the co-captain tapped
the weapons engineer stating, “ I don’t
trust these creatures. I have a strange feeling
they’re hiding something. I’ll pull the
ship out some and make some excuse regarding our
transmission malfunction. I bet they had
something to do with it. You get the shields up
on anything you feel warrants it.”
“Yes ma’am sir. I’m
ahead of you.”
“Engineer do you have a fix on
the problem?” She asked.
In the mean time, the premier had
listened to the whole conversation between the
captain and co-captain. He looked at his aide and
asked, “Well, what do you think?”
The aide replied, “They
underestimate our technology. That’s good.
We’ve jammed their deep space transmissions
for now. I believe they are developing a work-around
so we have to make a decision. I know we haven’t
gone cannie in centuries but sir…”
Just then the Captain walked in. She
said, “Your majesty we are so pleased to be
here. You are a joy to be with especially after
so many years in space and just being so formal
and all that. This is the first place in years
that I feel so alive.”
The aide whispered to the premier,
“Look at that smile. Look at that well
formed body, the muscles and my god she looks
good enough to eat…for old times sake?”
He wiped his face of a bit of drool.
The premier was taken by the captain
and in a split second decided.
As The Je-Nna left that planetary
system, the captain and crew never knew how close
they came to actually being the toast of the town.
By
Richard Tornello © 2021
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