A Short Analysis
of the SETI NOISE EMINATING
From The Dominant Creatures on the Planet Called
Earth
by Rick Tornello
Presented to the Intergalactic
Committee on the discovery of noises emanating
from a planet called Earth in the far distant
unmapped regions of the Universe.
To the most exalted knowing beings in the
Universe to who we give undying devotion, loyalty
and love our analysis follows:
****
A premise, a theory, a slight hint
at an underlying reality ignored by most that any
movement, idea, ideology or thing that one is
willing to throw total devotion and effort into,
is by its very nature, flawed. And why
would we posit that? Because no matter how
beneficial and benign the movement may seem, if
it has been concocted by crazy human apes they
will in no short time twist the origins and
foundation of these potentially good ideas into
something with no resemblances to the original
other then possibly in name.
There is not much more to conclude except to
mention that these apes will slaughter and kill
one another as well as pollute their home with
utter abandon in the name of these ideas and
beliefs. We conclude they are quite insane.
The Committee also suggests we just leave them to
their own devices and prevent any possible
communication with the greater universe with an
enforced quarantine, that is if you see fit and
if you will it.
This theory does not include the underlying real
possibility that they are really only there to
serve the bacteria and fungi that inhabit the
totality planet in a not even conceived manner by
these apes on that planet.
And furthermore, these bacteria and fungi are the
real dominant life forms and don’t
particularly care what these insane apes do as
long as the planet isn’t incinerated. They
have made it clear in the role these apes play
that we are not wanted there. The apes are in
fact a defensive weapon, and specially designed
to make the planet uninhabitable. And upon
further analysis actually represent these
bacteria and fungi in a most effective manner as
an extension of them in a multicellular
weaponized fashion. Many models have been
designed in the past but these are the best
models yet.
Our only solution is to wait for a Gamma Ray
Burst to sterilize this rock. And upon that
occurrence we can later sow new and saner life
forms or even colonize these outer fringes if we
so decide.
We await your all knowing answers and
recommendations.
Signed, The Committee.
©
Richard Tornello
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