January 7, 2013
- 8:28 P.M.
by Trevor Roe
Hey, Katie—it’s
Derek. Sorry I missed your call late last night;
I was busy tying up some loose ends. I guess
we’ll have to play phone tag for a bit. So
to respond to your message, I agree, we should
finally meet face to face. As far as the date
idea goes, I’m cool with just dinner for our
first date. Now I’ve got a great idea as to
how we should go about it. Wouldn’t it be
funny if we dressed up like we were going to a
five-star restaurant, though we’ll actually
be going to a regular sit-down restaurant? I was
thinking something like Longhorn Steakhouse,
Outback Steakhouse, or Applebee’s. Everyone
will be staring at us, thinking “What on
earth are they doing here dressed like that?”
and we’ll feel so high because of all the
attention we’ll be getting. I’ll dress
up in my dashing suit and tie outfit—J.T.!—and
you can wear an elegant dress with high heels; I
love my women tall. But anyways, I’ll pick
you up at your place at 7, which by the way,
you’re gonna have to give me your address
and we’re gonna have to come up with the
date of our date—ha, I’m so funny.
I’m available any night next week, except
for Wednesday night—that’s the night I
have class at college. So whichever day works
best for you, we’ll do it then. So back to
the first date details: I’ll swing by your
place, I’ll drive us in my car to the
restaurant, we’ll eat and get to know each
other better, then I’ll drive us back to
your place. Although, I do have some more ideas
involving the two of us before our date is
over…I just hope you’re willing.
Anyways, I’ve got something incredible that
I’ve got to share with somebody, and it
might as well be you. So yesterday, I attended
this Sex Addicts Anonymous meeting just to see
what it was all about. Now don’t start
thinking bad thoughts—I’m not a sex
addict—I’ve only had sex a couple times.
But anyways, I sat in on the meeting, and this
one guy surprised everybody when he said he was a
date rape addict. I was very intrigued at what he
had to say, and he basically told everyone that
he needed God’s help and prayers from
everybody who would listen and that he would
never go on another date without a third person
supervising. It really amazed me that there are
men in this world that would take advantage of a
woman—so terrible and sad—makes us guys
start to believe that a woman is only good for
cooking, cleaning, and pleasure, and that guys
can do whatever they want when the man and woman
are alone. But don’t worry, Katie, I’m
not one of those men. So that’s my story.
I’ll be looking forward to hearing your
responses, hopefully without an answering machine
this time. Bye, Katie.
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