No Turkey on
Thanksgiving?
by Jerry Guarino
The following year Tony and
Heather were crossing the border into Canada once
again. The last two trips were traumatic. First,
a gunfight with hostages in a Tim Horton’s
restaurant and last year Tony had a panic attack
on the Capilano Suspension Bridge. But Canada
also provided great fun at a hockey game and the
ambiance that Vancouver exudes, perfect to set up
a night of romance. Maybe this trip, their time
would be uneventful. Maybe not.
It started off well. The
delay at the border was only ten minutes.
“That’s a good
omen Heather.”
“Yes dear. We’ve
never passed through this fast. Did you make that
reservation for Thanksgiving dinner on Monday?”
“No, but I’m sure
we won’t need one. Two Thanksgivings for the
last two years. It’s our new tradition.”
“If only we could
arrange two Valentine’s Days?” Heather
leaned over and kissed Tony.
“It is one of the most
romantic places we’ve seen, a lot like San
Francisco. If only it was a little warmer.”
“But then we wouldn’t
have all the Fall colors. Red and orange leaves
painting the landscape.”
“Where should we go
first honey? Gastown? Granville Island Market?
Kitsilano Beach?”
Tony spotted his prize and
pulled up to a Tim Horton’s restaurant.
“Tony, don’t you
remember that last time we went here?”
“I remember how the
night ended; just trying to portend something
wonderful. Remember, we’re in Canada. There
is no crime here.”
Tony came back to the car
with a dozen donuts, in a box with hockey players,
equipment cutouts and a rink on the bottom.
“Check this out. Our
grandson will love this.”
“That’s too many
donuts dear. Remember your diabetes.”
“We have to eat them
so the hockey box doesn’t get stained.”
“Yes, a shrewd
marketing concept. People will buy more donuts to
get the prize box for their children.“
All right. You laugh, but
little things make a difference.”
Tony and Heather headed to
one of the tourist sites, North Shore Mountains.
There were trails and natural beauty, all free to
experience. The road curved around the mountains,
providing views of the water.
Rain started to come down,
then it turned into hail.
“Isn’t it pretty
Heather? Looks like little snowflakes.”
Heather wasn’t so sure.
“Careful dear, it could be slippery.”
As Tony drove around a
curve, he saw an accident in front of him. He
slammed on the brakes, sending him and Heather
hard into the seatbelts.
“Ouch,” said
Heather.
“Are you all right
dear?”
“My shoulder hurts.
That was quite a stop.”
But the donuts, carefully
arranged in their hockey box prize went flying
into the windshield. Chocolate and cream
splattered over the dashboard and on both of them.
“Ugh. Well, at least
the air bags didn’t come out.”
“We needed a seat belt
for the donut box.”
###
The couple checked into
their luxury hotel, the Fairmont Waterfront,
where they had stayed for the past two years.
Excellence in all ways. They unpacked and got
ready for the hockey game.
“We’ve been good
luck for the Canucks. Hope they’ll win
tonight.”
Although they had good
seats, center third in the upper bowl, the leg
room was made for people much smaller.
“Are these the kid
seats? I can barely fit my knees without touching
the back of the seats in front of us.”
“Try to enjoy the game
dear,” said Heather.
To complicate matters, two
very large men sat on each side of them spreading
their legs wide until Tony and Heather were
cramped together. By the second period, Tony was
getting annoyed. He tapped on each of the
intruders.
“Would you mind
sitting more in your seat. We’re very
crowded here.”
“I’m sitting
straight, not on your side.”
The other man was worse. He
only spoke French.
The Canucks wound up losing
and Tony and Heather walked out of there with
sore, tired legs.
“I just want to get
into the hotel hot tub and relieve these sore
muscles, and then get to bed.”
“Me too dear.”
But the hotel hot tub was
closed for cleaning.
The night had taken a
decidedly unromantic turn. By now, neither Tony
or Heather were interested in anything but sleep.
Tomorrow would certainly be a better day.
###
They made their way over to
Stanley Park, one of the most scenic places in
British Columbia. After taking some photographs
of the mountains and water, they went to the
Japanese Tea House for brunch.
“Look dear, they have
my favorite, crab cakes.”
The waiter, a young
Vietnamese man named Nick, came over. He poured
them water and asked if they had any questions
about the menu. Heather spoke first.
“I’ll have the
salmon and salad.”
“Very good ma’am.
And you sir?”
“The crab cakes and
some vegetable soup please.”
“I’m so sorry sir.
We’re all out of crab cakes. How about a
nice steak?”
“No Nick. I had my
heart set on crab cakes. How is the chicken?”
“Oh, very good.”
Nick took their menus.
“Heather, have you
noticed we’re having some mishaps getting in
the way of our perfect weekend?”
“That’s life
sweetheart. Remember, we have our Thanksgiving
dinner tonight.”
In spite of the
disappointment, the Tea House was wonderful. Tony
and Heather spent some time walking through the
park, holding hands like when they were younger.
“Now isn’t this
lovely Tony? The fall colors and the birds
singing.”
“Yes, I guess so.”
“I’ll bet the hot
tub is running again. Maybe we could try that and
a little romance before dinner.” Tony knew
exactly what Heather meant.
So, the afternoon delights
really made both of them fall back in love with
Vancouver again.
Tony and Heather cleaned up
for dinner and went down to the restaurant.
“Remember how great
their dinner was last year?”
“I do sweetheart.”
They walked up to the
hostess.
“Two for Thanksgiving
dinner please.”
“Do you have a
reservation sir?”
“No, I didn’t
make one.”
“I’m so sorry. We
are all filled up. I’m afraid we won’t
be able to serve you until ten o’clock. And
we didn’t get as much turkey in as expected,
but our café has turkey sandwiches.”
Tony and Heather looked at
each other. “I can’t wait three hours,
can you?”
So, the couple went over to
the café and sat down at the counter.
“We’re kind of
overdressed, honey.”
The waitress came over and
handed them a menu.
“No need. We want two
turkey sandwiches, with a side of apple pie.”
“Yes, our turkey
sandwiches are famous. You won’t be
disappointed.” The waitress smiled and left.
Suddenly, there was a loud
commotion in the kitchen. Tony and Heather could
hear noise, but couldn’t see what was going
on. After a few minutes, the waitress came out to
them.
“I’m so sorry sir.
We were just robbed.”
“We didn’t see
anyone at the register.”
“They came in through
the back. All they took was turkey and apple pie.
In fact, all the turkey we had.”
“Well, what do you
recommend?”
“The meatloaf is very
good. And we do have some Tim Horton’s
Boston Cream donuts!”
“Do you have the
hockey box they come in?”
“In fact, we do, but
you have to buy a dozen to get it.”
“Fine, bring on the
meatloaf and donuts.”
“Very good sir. Happy
Thanksgiving!”
No
Turkey on Thanksgiving? by Jerry Guarino
Copyright October, 2019 – All Rights
Reserved
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