Reversing in Asda
car park losers getting in the way
Manically glaring at you as they walk
their trolleys through your parking bay
Zitty youths in overgrown green uniform
hunched over a chain of trolleys
That veer dangerously from side to side
as they gaze gormlessly at you like
walliesRoad
Rage
Wide roads with
much room force you to drive slower than
an asthmatic snail
Yet country lanes that are narrow allow
ridiculously high speeds without fail
So that lunatic porsche drivers late for
their meeting
Can charge at you head on middle finger
extended by way of greeting
Road Rage
Ambulances
careering up behind you on their hospital
dash
Drivers swerve overdramatically into the
kerb almost causing another crash
Feeling guilty that you never saw it you
were listening to Funky FM
As you sung away happily some poor bugger
on a stretcher you did condemn
Road Rage
Roadworks ahead
builder standing in road with crappy stop/go
sign
Fat knackers showing ass cracks on
Ginsters they do dine
Lollipop ladies chatting to harassed mums
on their school run
Deliriously smiling at cars, standing in
the road must be such fun!
Road Rage
Private school
parents blocking the roads outside the
schools
Bearing down on you in 4X4s the toffee
nosed affected fools
Why such a big car to ferry a nasally
voiced brat in a straw boater
Just go to a normal school and buy a less
goddam massive moater
Road Rage
Traffic lights that
change to red as soon as you appear
Sat like a berk waiting for it it to
change you aint got all year
Trying to change lanes, alright, you took
the wrong one it's not a sin!
But it is to the burly lorry driver who
won't let you in
If they're not murdering backpackers or
eating like hogs in roadside cafes
They're getting paid to sit on their
sweaty backsides ruining our days
Road Rage
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