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Half Lives
by Michael C. Keith

 –– Mary and Harold go to Disney World every year.
 
 –– Susan has 6 kids and is planning on having another.
 
–– Kyle considers the Venetian in Las Vegas better than Venice itself.
 
–– The Johnsons only go for a drive on Sundays.  
 
–– Sarah raves about the cloths and shoes at Wal-Mart.
 
–– “The Bold and the Beautiful” is high drama to Jill.
 
–– Marvin and Kelli fight over which buffet restaurant is best.
       
–– Craig is driven crazy when dandelions appear in his yard.
 
–– Floyd Lipchitz buys a white Toyota Corolla.
 
–– Peggy Taylor watches The Sound of Music 37 times.
 
–– Chicken McNuggets are Dale’s favorite food.
 
–– Basil Rumford considers watching his lawn sprinkler an activity.
 
–– The Williams think humans are not meant to fly so take the bus cross-country.
 
–– Gladys moves to Sun City instead of Tahiti with her boyfriend.
 
–– Sam gets a canary for company.
 
–– A fun-filled, getaway weekend for the Taylors means a stay at Motel 6.
 
–– Helen always drives 5 MPH under the speed limit.
 
–– Percy’s favorite dessert is Fig Newton.
 
–– The Wilsons believe America is always right.