Morticia and Two
Aliens
by Don Drewniak
Without a
sound and its invisibility shield activated, a
flying saucer landed in a wooded area in the
western part of Tennessee
The shield was
disabled shortly thereafter revealing a silver-colored
saucer no more than sixty feet in diameter. An
approximate six foot high, four foot wide door
opened shortly thereafter. Out emerged two aliens.
Both were slightly over four feet in height and
very thin with small mouths, large black eyes,
elongated ears, bald heads and pale yellow skin.
They were wearing dark grey uniforms and carrying
disintegrator guns. Attached to their belts were
language translators.
Their orders
were to capture and bring back to the mother ship
the first human Earthling they found.
Pointing west,
the alien who appeared to be in charge said,
The house we saw is no more than four
hundred Earth feet in that direction. Off
they went.
They broke
into a clearing less than two minutes later. In
front of them was a small dilapidated house with
an enormous woman, nearly six feet in height and
close to 400 pounds, sitting in a rocking chair
on a porch and holding a quart-sized bottle in
her right hand. A second bottle was on the porch
floor no more than a foot from the chair.
With their
disintegrators pointed at her, the two aliens
stopped no more than five feet from the porch.
What is
your name, Earth woman? asked the senior
alien.
Morticia.
You must
come with us, Morticia.
"Where to,
boys?
Our
spaceship.
Mind if
I finish off this bottle?
What is
in it?
Genuine
Tennessee moonshine.
What is
moonshine?
If you
are sick, it makes you feel better. If you are
sad, it makes you feel happy. Care to try some?
She reached
down, picked up the second bottle and held it out
in front of her.
The aliens
looked at one another. Why not? asked
the junior alien.
Okay,
get it. I'll cover you.
No more than
ten minutes later, they were sitting on the floor
of the porch with an empty bottle.
Do you
have anymore? asked the senior alien.
Come
inside with me.
In they went
and were rewarded with a new bottle.
Morticia
smiled as she watched them polish off the second
bottle. Their eyes were drooping and the
disintegrators were on the floor. Looking
directly at them, she rolled her tongue several
times around her lips and asked, Would you
boys like me to do something special to you?
Something
special? the aliens asked in unison.
Yes,
very special. She pointed to a bed in an
adjacent room.
The senior
alien hesitated before saying, "We must be
back to our ship in a little less than two of
your Earth hours."
She once again
rolled her tongue. This won't take long. Go
into the bedroom, take off your uniforms, and lie
down on your backs in the middle of the bed. Let
me know when you are ready."
In they went
tripping over themselves. Less than two minutes
later they both yelled, Ready.
Morticia broke
into a run on the far side of the kitchen and
took a headfirst leap as she approached the end
of the double bed. The two trapped aliens
screamed and there were loud sounds of cracking
bones as she landed squarely on top of them.
They stopped
breathing less than a minute later. She waited
another three minutes before removing herself
from the crushed aliens.
Walking into
the kitchen, she pulled a large carving knife out
of a cabinet drawer. Back in the bedroom, she
added two notches to three others on the side of
a closet door.
Copyright
© 2024 by Don Drewniak. All rights reserved.
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