The Short Humour Site









Home : Writers' Showcase : Submission Guidelines : A Man of a Few More Words : Links

Writers' Showcase

A Decent Man
by Kim Wedler

I’m just looking for a decent man, 
That’s my plan. 
Why are they so hard to find? 
Just someone who’s gentle and kind. 
I don’t want a gambler, a drunk or a thief, 
Just a man with hair and his own set of teeth. 
Not a man who goes to the pub for hours and hours,  
And doesn’t remember to have daily showers. 
 
I’m just looking for a decent man, 
That’s my plan. 
 
Just someone to laugh with and share a private joke. 
To introduce to my friends as my decent bloke. 
He’d meet me from work and take me out to eat, 
We’d hold hands romantically as we walked down the street. 
I used to be fussy and have a certain type, 
Now I’m just looking for one who can keep upright. 
 
I’m just looking for a decent man, 
That’s my plan. 
 
The boyfriends I’ve had, 
Haven’t been particularly bad, 
Just lazy and slow, 
They had to go! 
No chocolates or flowers or even nice wine, 
No smoochy cards to “My Valentine.” 
 
I’m just looking for a decent man, 
That’s my plan. 
So, please if you’re out there and really quite pleasant, 
I’m house 22, on Deansbreak Crescent,  
The one with the washing line, with only girl’s skirts, 
No ties, large black socks, or business shirts. 
One solitary milk bottle left by the gate, 
Give it some thought if you’re ready to date. 
 
I’m just looking for a decent man, 
That’s my plan.