You Are Here and
the Time is Now
by Flora Jardine
Not everyone
has a cell phone, which means some of us have to
run around town wondering what time it is. I'm
one of those. Is there a time for us, somewhere
-- or are we to be forever too late or too early?
When's the
last time you saw a clock in public? They used to
be prominent, often dignified by their own towers.
We have every other “public” thing:
public transport, public housing, public rubbish
bins, public safe injection sites ... but not
clocks. Why? Have they been banned, like smoking,
or driving?
I had to meet
a friend for coffee. Was I late or early? A
philosophical question and scientific enough for
Einstein. Is time relative, or clocks only
relatively absent? I only know my friend expects
me to show up absolutely. I came downtown on the
bus (which clearly had no absolute schedule) and
I thought I remembered the analog clock on my
stove showing that the time when I left home was
noon. Approximately. If only I could check a
clock tower.
I know: I'll
check the sun, like the ancients did. At what
time does it reach its apex? And where exactly in
the sky is its apex? Damn it: more Einstein. Can't
I meet a friend without having to be a physicist?
I am more a Wordsworth than an Einstein: “late
and soon I lay waste my power”, or so it
seems.
“Time
gentlemen” -- remember when they said that
in pubs at 11:00 pm? So everyone at least knew
when it was 11:00 pm. Is there a gentleman around
here now, who could tell me whether it's 1:00 pm?
Maybe a gentleman with a pocket watch, like that
creepy rabbit that Alice met on her way to
Wonderland?
Now it's me in
Wonderland, wondering what time it is. Maybe the
City should hire a team of paid gentlemen with
pocket watches as a public service. It would be
useful for tourists -- assuming not every single
one of them has a cell phone -- and a safety
measure for those who do. It's no wonder
pedestrians keep bumping into things and falling
off curbs; they have to keep looking down at
their phones to learn the time of day, instead of
glancing up at a clock. The City could hire a
team of time-tellers dressed as White Rabbits.
They could double as tourist marketing agents.
"And
since you're here,” they would add as they
revealed the time of day, “you should know
that the Museum opens at 10:00, the Art Gallery
at 11:00, and the Harbour Tours begin at noon.
Enjoy your stay – we hope you have the time
of your life.”
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