Charles
by Rebecca
Rhodes
It had taken
Liam three years to work up the courage to admit
he despised and genuinely feared Charles. Charles
was no longer a respected member of Liam’s
family, let alone a tolerable roommate. Liam had
finally realized that it was a matter of safety--he
needed to get rid of Charles through any means
necessary, so he took to Craigslist.
“Seeking
to sell Charles, a sixteen-foot-long Burmese
python.” Liam, with his fingers nervously
hovering over the keyboard, dared to glance at
the corner of his room, where the inch-thick
glass tank held back Charles. The snake opened
one eye and its slitted pupil seemed to focus on
Liam. Charles flicked his tongue lazily as he
stared at his owner, and Liam got the distinct
impression the snake was sizing up his next meal.
Trembling
slightly, Liam stared at the screen of his
computer and continued typing his craigslist ad,
though now he instinctively angled the laptop
screen away from Charles, as if he was afraid the
python would discover his plans. He looked over
what he’d written, hoping it could make
Charles seem like a family-friendly pet, but no
matter how much he wanted someone else to free
him of the snake for good, Liam morally couldn’t
bring himself to omit certain information from
the ad. Hesitating, he typed, “Charles needs
his dinner at exactly eight-thirty pm. Otherwise
he gets vengeful and weasels his way out of the
terrarium to take matters into his own hands.”
Liam shuddered, remembering how his landlord had
already lost two chihuahuas to his snake’s
hunger-fueled wrath, and he left the warning in.
He glanced up
at the snake once more to see the rectangular
eyes still boring into his neck. Liam wiped drops
of sweat off of his forehead and finished the ad
with “all reasonable offers accepted. No
offer is unreasonable.” He posted the ad and
continued staring at the laptop screen, waiting
for responses that would never come.
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